Sunshine and Unicorns at the Hospital (IBD part 2)

So I’d left my IBD story at my second surgery the day after Christmas.  Things were going really well, so well that my surgeon said I’d probably be able to go home in a couple of days.  So I was really excited about that.  But 2 days later I was feeling so sick I couldn’t move without wanting to throw up.  I felt terrible!  Even the smell of food made me sick.  My doc came in the and decided I needed an NG tube.  I had no idea what this was, but she promised it would make me feel better.  This was Sunday morning, after ordering the NG tube, she left and the nurse went to work.  She explained that the tube would run through my nose down into my stomach and that she would have me take a big drink and swallow as she did it to help get the tube in place.  I was nervous as hell, but tried to do exactly as she said.  But I immediately started gagging, and I remember flailing about trying to breath.  I remember the nurse just pushed me down and held me there as she shoved that tube in.  I know she was just doing her best to do her job but I am not kidding when I say it was one of the most traumatic things to ever happen to me and this is coming from a rape victim.  It was horrible.  I was in tears and throwing up for the next 5 minutes.  I kept trying to tell her I couldn’t breathe and asked if this was how it was supposed to feel and she literally DID NOT RESPOND.  She said NOTHING.  Just went about cleaning up and then left the room while I had a bucket full of vomit and tears running down my face.  I can’t even describe how awful this experience was for me.

I spent the next 2 days lying still trying not to move or talk or swallow because everything was really painful.  I threw up a couple more times and in over 48 hours that stupid NG tube did not collect any fluids from my belly.  In fact, the same nurse told me hours after the “terror” that I probably didn’t need the NG tube.  But because it was the weekend, I couldn’t get it removed till I saw my doctor again.  Not only that, it was New Years Eve… I spent it lying alone in misery in my room.  My surgeon, who, had said she would be in the next day I didn’t see again at all.  In fact the following Monday she sent her partner in.  I had never met her partner… she was the type to come in a room and just tell you how it was then leave.  The next morning when I saw her again I lost it.  I kept trying to ask a question that she would not answer, she just kept telling me I wasn’t healthy enough to leave (which btw, had NOTHING to do with my question!).

Before she left I was in tears AGAIN, but SHE was defensive (and still wouldn’t answer my question) and I finally just said “fine. I’m done.  Whatever…”  So she left.  And I BAWLED.  The nurse was very kind, though she probably thought she had a real troublemaker on her hands… (this was a new nurse).  I finally survived the stay and got to go home.  But it was definitely one of the hardest weeks I had in the hospital.

The next 3 months were tough too.  The loop illeostomy was so much harder to take care of and I had a lot of problems with leakage.  By the time I figured out what appliances to use for the best fit, it was time for takedown.  Takedown was supposed to be pretty quick surgery.  In and out to close up the stoma where my small intestine had poked through.  Lucky me, my surgery took hours because there was so much scar tissue she had to clean up just to close the wound up.  I wasn’t supposed to have any new incisions, but I left with an even bigger one that I had started with.  And the way it was stapled up, I thought it would never look normal again!

It was about another 10 days in the hospital again- my stomach likes to tease me with a couple of good days before shutting down completely.  Then it takes a few more days to wake up.  It finally did though and I went home, pooping in a whole new way!

To be continued….

Since I haven’t posted any bellydance videos yet and I’ve been writing exstensively about tummies, I thought this would be a good place to show a favorite video:

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