Blank

I was an empty canvas, I had finally started to paint.

At long last I’d found courage to take up the task,

And I did slowly learn to create.

 
Bit by bit, I shed the scales of fear, but I had only just begun.

A toe, just tipped in the water, years of hiding to be undone.

 
I might have been so beautiful, but you broke into my place.

And I never can stop asking “what else might have been built within my space?”

 
And so, a toe pulled back, hiding  again in fear.

Burrowing ever so deeper to find some safety, even still, after all these years.

 
And yes, I am enraged when I let my fear be known

How else should I expect to feel, when my life has never been my own?

 
You held a fragile piece of what just might have been,

And with a mighty force you shattered it, brought the creation to an end.

 
And so I stand here, a painting I cannot complete.

At times I want to take up the brush, but my will’s become so weak.

 

… A brush here, a dab there… still I paint the best I can…

With hope one day this painting can still reveal exactly who I am.

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All of these things…

So I’m heading out of town again to see the doctor and get another scope of my illeostomy to see if it is doing better.  I know already it’s not.  I’ve been throwing up more often, just randomly, and my stoma is still pretty raw and bleeding.

However, this morning I lay in bed thinking of so many things… the sad, the awful, the traumatic… the lonely, the losses of so many precious things… but also of the triumphant and the beautiful.

I like who I am- even if I am a beautiful mess.  And all that pain… well it’s part of who I am.  But so is all that beauty and wonder and color.  I forget so often… but this song reminded me.

(AWOLNATION “I Am”)

Enjoy your burrito…

Enjoy your burrito.  Enjoy my burrito.  God knows I’d like to.

It may be necessary to explain this phrase, especially if you’re not the nerd I am:

Enjoy your burrito

Nerdist Presents: Enjoy Your Burrito

And damn, if that’s not good advice.  But… it’s not really working.  I think I found a more appropriate description to how I feel these days….

(Watch the video, read the lyrics and watch it one more time.  You think this bit is about comedy, but the whole damn thing is much, much deeper and I think every word is a metaphor for something else…)

It takes a couple minutes into the song, but this is what my burrito is like these days:

Lyrics by Bo Burnham

Can I say my shit?
Can I say my shit?
I’ve got lots of shit to say
I’ve got lots of shit to say
I can’t fit my hand inside a pringle can
I have a huge amount of trouble
Fitting my hand inside a pringle can
I can get my hand like four inches in
But then I have to tilt the can into my mouth
But then a bunch of crumbs have accumulated at the bottom of the can
So they all go spilling onto my face
What I’m trying to say is that the diameter
Of pringle cans are way too small
I’ll say it again
The diameter of a pringle can is way too small
Two raidiuses of a pringle can is way too small
If you feel me, put your hands up
Come on!
If you feel me, put your hands up
Look at all these hands that are way too big to fit inside a pringle can
Those hands are too big to fit inside a pringle can
Your hands are too big to fit inside a pringle can
You think you can, I know you can
Pringles!
Listen to the people, I am sure ninety percent of the complaint letters you get
Are about the fucking width of your cans
We’re not animals
Okay, I’ve overdone the pringles thing
Sorry
I want to have a daughter
I want to have a daughter
So I can finally have someone around the house who can fit their hands
Into pringle cans
Yes, I’m still on the pringle cans thing!
I will move on, alright?
But that is priority numbero uno
I don’t go to the gym
Because I’m self concious about my body
But I’m self concious about my body because I don’t go to the gym
Isn’t that- That’s irony
Irony can be painful
Alright, let’s do this
Let’s do this!
I went to Chipotle
I went to Chipotle
And I got myself a chicken burrito
I went down the line, and I got all these ingredients
And at the end of the line
The guy tried to wrap the burrito
But half of the shit inside the burrito spilled out
I was like, dude you should have warned me!
You’re a burrito expert
You should have told me halfway through!
Hey, man. You might be reaching maximum burrito capacity here
Do you fucking think I want a messy burrito?
No one wants a messy burrito
The whole appeal of the burrito is that all of the ingredients are contained
Within the confines of the tortilla
I wouldn’t have gotten half of the shit if I knew it wasn’t gonna fit inside it! Alright?
I wouldn’t of got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn’t fit
I wouldn’t of got the cheese if I knew it wouldn’t fit
I wouldn’t of got the peppers if I knew it wouldn’t fit
I wouldn’t have got
Half of it
I’m okay with small mistakes
If you’ve got no more chicken, I’ll take pork
But I’ll blow my dad before I eat a burrito with a fork
I wouldn’t of got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn’t fit
I wouldn’t of got the cheese if I knew it wouldn’t fit
I wouldn’t of got the peppers if I knew it wouldn’t fit
I wouldn’t have got half of it right
Half of it right
Half of it right
Half of it right now
I think it’s time I
Think it’s time I think we’ll break it down

Put the lotion in the basket
No, they’re too young
I can sit here and pretend
Like my biggest problems are
Pringle cans
And burritos
But the truth is, my biggest problem is you
I want to please you
But I want to stay true to myself
I want to give you the night out that you deserve
But I want to say what I think
And not care what you think about it
Part of me loves you
Part of me hates you
Part of me needs you
Part of me fears you
And I don’t think that I can handle this right now
I don’t think that I can handle this right now
I don’t think that I can handle this right now

I don’t think that I can handle this right now. [x2]
They don’t even know the half of this right now
Look at them, they’re just staring at me
Like come and watch the
Skinny kid with a
Steadily declining mental health
And laugh as he attempts to give you what he cannot give himself

I don’t think that I can handle this right now. [x2]
They don’t even know the half of this right now
They don’t even know the half of it
But I know I’m not a doctor
I’m a pussy who puts
On a silly show
So I should probably just shut up
And do my job
So here I go

I wouldn’t of got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn’t fit
I wouldn’t of got the cheese if I knew it wouldn’t fit
I wouldn’t of got the peppers if I knew it wouldn’t fit
I wouldn’t of got half
You can tell them anything if
You just make it funny
Make it rhyme
If they still don’t understand you
Then you
Run it one more time

I don’t think that I can handle this right now. [x2]
If you think that I can handle this right now
Then you don’t even know the half of this right now
Right now
Now
Handle this right
Handle this right
Handle this right now

I just blew up my facebook account…

well ok.  maybe not really.  I don’t know.  But it felt really important to me to say something all day long.  So I did.  I have LARGELY kept personal stuff off of facebook, because i kind of hate facebook.  And I have a lot of old friends, a few new friends, who don’t know about some of what has happened in my life.  Not necessarily because I don’t want them to… it’s just… you know… you don’t go around talking about that stuff everywhere, right?

Well, I just posted the following :

2 days ago I shared a link and I appreciate anyone who read it and took the time to contact their rep. But if you are anything like ME, you probably read it, liked it and moved on. I’m guilty of this all the time. But since initially sharing this, I watched the 2 hr congressional hearing the article links to. And I feel pressed to share something I never thought I would share on facebook, of all places. I feel I need to explain why this is important to me personally and ask again for you to take just a moment to contact your reps.

17 years and 29 days ago, I was assaulted in my home by a masked intruder who held a knife to me and threatened my life. I firmly believed that was my last night on this earth, but I lived. Before he left, he promised that he would
come back and kill me if I went to the police. I believed him.

The brain does a thing sometimes, and at this point, most of the details are fuzzy. But thanks to an amazing aunt and uncle who were able to be there when my parents could not, I went to the ER and reported the crime to the police anyway. I do remember I spent about 8 hours in the ER that night. A good portion of that time was spent on an examination table as my body became a crime scene. Again, about the only thing I remember about this was my aunt holding my hand, keeping eye contact, and giving me her love and support.

I was lucky, which is a weird thing to say after the preceding sentences, but my case moved quickly. Good law enforcement, a good prosecutor, and kind of a dumb perpetrator who didn’t cover his tracks well. They convinced him to plead guilty and he received a sentence of 10 years to life. It took less than 2 months for him to end up behind bars. He is still there, and hopefully he spends the rest of his life there.

But I know too many people who still don’t know who assaulted them. There is no tracking system for the backlog of rape kits still waiting to be processed. Estimates are anywhere from 100,000 to 400,000 kits in backlog. MANY have sat on a shelf well past the statute of limitations to even prosecute the perpetrator. If you know the statistics involving sexual assault, you know there is an average of almost 300,00 victims a year and 68% of assaults are not reported to the police. So for the small percentage of people who submit to lying on that table and being examined head to toe for hours after the most
traumatic experience of their life, it is absolutely DEVASTATING to me to think that that evidence then just sits forgotten on a shelf. We submit to that examination because getting that criminal behind bars is the only way we will feel safe again. We do it because we are told and convinced that this will keep the perpetrator from hurting anyone else. But when the evidence goes unprocessed, we don’t get either of those things. Just another traumatic memory and the message that what happened to us didn’t matter.

During the hearing, they tell many stories. One of a 13 yr old girl, assaulted at home in her bed. It was 20 years before her rape kit was processed and the perpetrator identified, again past the statue of limitations, the ability to prosecute gone. I only had to wait about a week before they had a suspect and a taped confession. But if I was still waiting, 17 years later, I’m honestly not sure I’d be here today. I know I wouldn’t feel ANYthing close to safe, ever. Having him in prision, has given a little of that safety back to me.

Turns out it was a neighbor, in the apartment below me. Someone who had always been nice and friendly. Someone I considered safe. Back then, I could not believe that this kind of thing could ever happen to me. I think most of us
try to convince ourselves of this. But the truth is that more awareness and education is some of the best protection we can have and the best way to create change. For years I have wanted to somehow be an advocate for this cause but
didn’t know how to do it without overtaxing myself physically or emotionally. But sharing a little of my story in the hopes that it will convince you to take just a couple of minutes to click this link https://rainn.org/public-policy/rainn-action-center and copy and paste a letter or tweet to your representative would help me in my hopes to be an advocate for change.

And please, feel free to share this. I hold my story close, not because I don’t feel I can talk about it, but because I don’t think people want to hear it. But in this case, I just couldn’t get rid of the feeling that this was the time for me to share something personal in the hopes of making a difference. Most likely, someone else you know has a similar story and might also be touched to know that you care about this issue.

So now I’ll get off whatever soapbox I may be standing on and just ask… please take the time to make a difference. Thanks and love.

In testimony to the Senate today, RAINN’s president called on policymakers to address the ‪#‎rapekitbacklog‬: “By not conducting DNA testing on evidence from open rape cases, we’re denying justice to hundreds of thousands of rape survivors while leaving communities at risk from serial predators,” said President Scott Berkowitz. “The rape kit backlog plays a big role in this state of affairs.” http://ow.ly/NdeC4

=-=-=-=-

So yeah.  A lot of thought and conversation with a close friend went into it.  I feel like it came from a healthy place and I don’t regret doing it.  I really really hope people respond to it.  But yeah, have to admit… there’s a little bit of anxiety about “crossing the streams” and sharing something that I have only written about here on a public forum.  But it feels right.  And if you’re reading this?  Maybe you could also click on that link and contact your representative, too.

Why do I keep using the #AlwaysKeepFighting hashtag…

Why do I keep using the #AlwaysKeepFighting hashtag? Welcome to the #SPNFamily…

A couple of months ago Jared Padalecki, one of the stars of Supernatural, started a campaign to raise money and awareness for charities like To Write Love On Her Arms.  He shared a lot about his own struggles with depression and suicidal thoughts, and his own need for strength and help.  It started with a tee shirt that said “Always Keep Fighting”.  The fandom really took to it.

AKF

For me personally, I came across the Always Keep Fighting campaign on a really really shit day.  It was really one of those days where I just was asking “What the hell am I here for?”  And those words, and his openness and sincerity, actually brought me to tears.  It was just one of those moments you get too rarely when you feel like the world is telling you something.  And I was like… “Man, Jared!  How did you know I needed this today?”

I’m actually sort of addicted to buying geek t-shirts.  It’s pretty much all I wear.  But I usually go for the subtle.  Not the whole- “celebrity on a t-shirt” thing.  Even Jared mentioned he wasn’t sure about putting his face on the shirt, but everyone convinced him it made it more personal (I agree). And… while I wasn’t sure if I would wear it (because- face on a t-shirt?), I knew I wanted to support it and TWLOHA.

It’s kinda become one of my favorite shirts.  When I’m having another shit day, wearing the shirt has reminded me of the message and kept me going.  And people have noticed it and either recognized it themselves or asked about it.  Which is awesome!  YES.  Let’s have a healthy dialogue about mental illness, suicide, addiction, depression, PTSD.  YES TO ALL THIS!

Since the original campaign ended, it has grown into a much bigger thing that both stars, Jared and Jensen Ackles, AND the fans are continuing to raise money and awareness for.  In the last couple of weeks, Jared has been experiencing his own personal crisis and the whole thing has just blown up in response (in a good way).  It’s actually kind of reminded me how awesome people can be.  The world is not full of hate and horrible things.  There is a lot of love out there.

https://fangasmthebook.wordpress.com/2015/05/19/what-the-spnfamily-is-all-about-always-keep-fighting-jared/

If you’re not familiar with these guys and this fandom, it might be easy to see this and think that it’s not sincere.  That it’s a bunch of hot guys getting their faces on t-shirts and making more money.  Publicity stunts.  But you wouldn’t have to look into things very far to realize these guys really just want to do a good thing and use the fan following they have to accomplish great things.

You might also find some weird stuff.  The fandom is known for some of it’s weird stuff.  Not gonna lie.  BUT the fandom really is also known for doing some really awesome things like this.  The official hashtag used to be “SPNfamily” (I don’t know, maybe it still is…) but #AKF and #AlwaysKeepFighting are really what it’s all about.  And hell yes, I will go down with this ship.  Even if I still appear to be a silly fangirl.  I don’t care.  This thing, this show, these people, this fandom, show love that gives me strength on days I’m not sure I can find it.   (Even though I will NEVER forgive you, writers, for that THING YOU DID IN EPISODE 10×21.  grrr… the only time I’ve ever hated Show :/  I’m still not over it.)

PHEW.  SO on that note, I’m gonna leave another reason I love this fandom.  I haven’t posted a fanvid in a LONG time guys.  And this one is technically a parody, so it doesn’t count.  And, true, I’m not sure you’ll really get it or love it if you don’t know the show, but… oh well.  It makes me happy 🙂 ummm spoilers for season 9 and 10 though, if that is important to you?

By the way, the cast cameos at the end- they heard about this video being made and totally volunteered to do it just because they knew the fans would love it.  No pay.  Just love.

And you know what?  Because I’m in such a giving mood… hahah… (actually, it’s probably just the late hour getting to me) but I’m gonna leave ya with one more gem.  But this is one that always gives me chills and makes me cry.  This song is sort of our anthem…

Ok.  Thank you.  Good nite.  I love you all 😉

All the feels (have I used this subject title before? hmmm….)

I feel like I’ve been a terrible friend here online, so I’m sorry.  I love all of you who I have talked with here online.  Those of you who have shared such personal pieces of yourself… I feel like you deserve more from me, especially when you have given me so much by reading and support me!  I know you know I’m doing the best I can right now, but I still feel the need to acknowledge it.  Just a week and a half ago, I got introduced to some really great stuff by CC and Alex over at https://ccchanel41.wordpress.com/  (Refractory Ramblings from the Darkside).  Both things have totally gone into my coping strategies toolbox.

First, Bo Burnham and “What.” is the most genius things I’ve seen in a while.  Laughter and truth all in one.  https://youtu.be/ejc5zic4q2A  His show is free on Youtube and Netflix.  It’s totally NSFW but watch when you can because it’s brilliant and I’ve watched it like 5 times in the last 8 days, hahah.  I feel bad for the people (who are too too many) I can’t share it with because of content.  They are missing something awesome.

Second?  Amanda Palmer.  How did I not know this woman existed???  In the hours I haven’t been watching Bo Burnham, she’s been playing 24/7.  I love music of all kinds.  I communicate and find places where my feelings exist in music very often, but there are only a few who just bring the feels with every word.  Even when I don’t know what she’s referring to, the emotion is still there and it’s just wrapped itself around my heart!  I can’t even describe it.  I could share any number of her songs here, but the one that’s really gotten too me the last few days is “Trout Heart Replica.”

At first, the lyrics that caught me were:

And killing things is not so hard
It’s hurting that’s the hardest part
And when the wizard gets to me
I’m asking for a smaller heart

And then one day…

And the butcher stops and winds his watch and lays their lives down on the block
He raises up his hatchet and the big hand strikes a compromise
Wait, we’ll trade you
Wait
Please just one more day
And then we’ll go with no complaining
No complaining
No complaining
No complaining

And holy shit.  I remembered that feeling.  The “butcher” holding me down with a knife, and all I could think was Wait… Just one more day…Please just one more day.  And now the whole song takes even more meaning and a new feeling and I just keep listening to it.

I’m not the fish anymore, right now.  But….

they’re cutting
And they’re cutting
And I think that I know
And they’re gutting
And they’re gutting
And I think that I know
And it’s beating
Look, it’s beating
And I don’t want to know
And it’s beating
Look, it’s still beating
God, I don’t want to know

And killing things is not so hard
It’s hurting that’s the hardest part
And when the wizard gets to me
I’m asking for a smaller heart
And if he tells me “no”
I’ll hold my breath until I hit the floor
Eventually I’m know I’m doomed
To get what I am asking for…

I’ve never been able to put such accurate words to the way I feel.  Smaller heart?  YES PLEASE.  THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

So much about this song!

dwfeels

So I actually have a lot of life stuff to write about… but I keep avoiding it, so I’m starting easy today.  Maybe I will try again tomorrow to write about what’s been up.  ‘Cause this brain needs to dump.  Room is very scarce for anything else.

Hope you love Bo and Amanda as much as I do now.  And as much as I love you all.

#AlwaysKeepFighting  (yes, I will keep using this hashtag on posts because its something I am desperately taking to heart and I need the constant reminder myself.)

These Precious Things

These precious things
Let them bleed
Let them wash away
These precious things
Let them break
Let them wash away
These these precious things
Let them bleed now
Let them wash away
These these precious things
Let them break their hold over me

(Tori Amos- Precious Things)

I was an angel

In the land of Gods and Monsters
I was an Angel
Living in the garden of evil
Screwed up, scared, doing anything that I needed
Shining like a fiery beacon

You got that medicine I need
Fame, Liquor, Love give it to me slowly
Put your hands on my waist, do it softly
Me and God, we don’t get along so now I sing

No one’s gonna take my soul away
I’m living like Jim Morrison
Headed towards a fucked up holiday
Motel sprees sprees and I’m singing
‘Fuck yeah give it to me this is heaven, what I truly
Want’
It’s innocence lost
Innocence lost

In the land of Gods and Monsters
I was an Angel
Looking to get fucked hard
Like a groupie incognito posing as a real singer
Life imitates art

You got that medicine I need
Dope, shoot it up, straight to the heart please
I don’t really wanna know what’s good for me
God’s dead, I said ‘baby that’s alright with me’

No one’s gonna take my soul away
I’m living like Jim Morrison
Headed towards a fucked up holiday
Motel sprees sprees and I’m singing
‘Fuck yeah give it to me this is heaven, what I truly
Want’
It’s innocence lost
Innocence lost

When you talk it’s like a movie and you’re making me
Crazy –
Cause life imitates art
If I get a little prettier can I be your baby?
You tell me, “life isn’t that hard”

No one’s gonna take my soul away
I’m living like Jim Morrison
Headed towards a fucked up holiday
Motel sprees sprees and I’m singing
‘Fuck yeah give it to me this is heaven, what I truly
Want’
It’s innocence lost
Innocence lost

-Gods & Monsters by Lana Del Rey

I was going to write a narrative to go with each piece of lyrics, but then I decided the song spoke better for itself AND for me than I could… but tried to use color instead to match the emotion for me.  Did it work?  Well enough for me 🙂

I’m attaching a fan vid first because it’s where I discovered this song and I love the video.  HOWEVER, if you want to avoid spoilers for “Lost Girl” season 4 don’t watch this first version.  Watch the second instead.

Non-spoilery song with lyrics:

=-=-=-=

Since I haven’t posted many fanvids lately, and now I’m in a “Lost Girl” sort of mood, here’s one more for Kenzi, who is my heart as well… she don’t take shit from NO one…!  (Both fanvids were made/edited by The Suffering Fool)

Not about angels

So yeah… emotional, heavy last week or so.  Lots of experiences to think and write about.  And today has kinda been a hard day.  I missed my cymbalta for two days due to refill hassles you run into when traveling.  Stupid stupid insurance companies and “contracted” pharmacies.  But finally got my pills… feeling the effects of missing them though.

I want to write about ALL the goings on of late,but I’m just going to bite of a teeny tiny chunk.  Was able to see my old friend Teri this week.  Haven’t seen her in over a year and  a half, but we were very close.  She was my “woo woo” friend.  We used to find all the alternative practitioners in town… search out the tarot readers, psychics… just we did a lot of searching and talking together.  Something I’ve missed.

So we were able to meet for lunch, then had a little time to run to the bookstore.  And we were there looking at all the cool new age books and tarot sets… and the more I looked, the more I realized I have been searching outside for something I am just going to have to figure out how to find inside.  I keep thinking God is out there somewhere… but truth is, my God just ISN’T out there.  If it’s anywhere,.. I’m going to have to find it inside.  All the books, the intuitives, etc… they don’t have my answers.

Which is too bad, ’cause… I’m just …. man, the whole God thing… I have so much anger and frustration, confusion… SO MUCH…. I just don’t know if I’ll ever untangle that mess inside.

Someone asked me last week if I had been able to forgive, referring to my assault.  I pretty much don’t think about him all that much, and I have empathy for what his life was growing up, so I don’t know if that’s forgiveness or not, but I don’t think it’s a bad place to be either.  I’ve worked a lot on forgiving myself, so I don’t think I’m really hung up there… but how do you forgive GOD?  Especially when you don’t even know what or who God is to you?  I know what I want to believe… but I know what the facts of my life say.  And I can’t make the two coincide.  I just can’t.

But anyway,  back to my epiphany… it’s not in those books… it’s not in the angels…

And this song probably only loosely ties in, but it hits the right feels and that last line… I just love it right now….(someday I’m going to write about that damn movie….)

Cutting my hands up

How do you still break my heart after so many damn years?  I get it now… I keep asking you for something you just don’t know how to give me.  Or maybe you don’t have it to give at all.  Can I fault you for that?  I know I keep faulting myself.  WHY CAN’T YOU JUST SEE ME?  love me?  Does anybody really ever see anybody else?  I’m sorry it makes you feel so conflicted.  I only want to understand… and… perhaps see.  Don’t you get that all these years, I have only wanted to see you too?

Is it wrong to want so little, so much?  I don’t know.  I just know it tears me up every time I try to find that line, that thread that connects me to you.  And with every question I ask, you just think I’m trying to hurt you?  I don’t understand.  And you tell me it’s just me.  Why do I have to make it so difficult?  Why do I need to know?

Somedays I want to run so far far away… find that solitude, cut away my past.  What if its the only way I can find myself?  But the strongest sword in the world never seems to completely hack away that tie.

You say it like I have some devious plot- to throw a bomb out into the midst and see what kind of conflict I can stir up?  Don’t you understand, the bomb dropped forever ago.  Its the shrapnel in my heart I’m trying to clear out.  Pieces with your name on it… just… help me.  Please.

But you don’t know how.

=-=-=

This will probably make nearly zero sense.  But this is the song I’m feeling right now.  It’s about a different kind of relationship so I changed the words to my words down below.  Just seemed to fit for me.

All the world just stopped now.  So you say you don’t want to try to understand anymore

Let me take a deep breath…

if you need me, me and him’ll be hanging out with the dream king.

He says hi, by the way

It don’t believe it’s cause me and Charles Manson like the same ice cream.

I think it’s “that girl”. I know there are pieces of me you’ve never seen.  Maybe I’m just pieces of me you’ve never seen well.

All the world is all I am

The black of the blackest ocean and that tear in your hand

All the world is dangling dangling dangling for me darlin’

You don’t know the power that you have with that tear in your hand.

Maybe I ain’t used to maybes smashing in a cold room

Cutting my hands up every time I touch you

Maybe it’s time to wave goodbye now… time… to wave… goodbye

Caught a ride with the moon. 

I know you well, well better than I used to

Haze all clouded up my mind in the daze of the way it could’ve never been

so you say and I say… I know I’m full of wish

But I tell you there’re pieces of me you’ve never seen

I’m just pieces of me you’ve never seen…

All the world is all that I am

The black of the blackest ocean and that tear in your hand.

All the world is dangling dangling dangling for me darlin’

You don’t know the power that you have with that tear in your hand.

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Until Now

Life. Lessons. Love.

eurobrat

Surviving The Trumpages

markwatches.net/reviews/

Mark watches full runs of television series.

Budget Bytes

My stomach is full, and my wallet is too.

Sage Goddess

The path to healing is not a yellow brick road...

Praying for Eyebrowz

Doing the best I can with what I have

The Pursuit of Badassery

Live bold || Seek truth || Own your story || Never surrender || Be fucking brave.

Colitis To Ostomy

Punk Rock Ostomate

At The Dance Floor

you might find crazy, funny, beautiful & inspiring people and their dance moves

Gemineye Whole Health & Wellness

Holstic Lifestyle Made Real

Writing my Waves

learning to cope with mental illness

Runtu's Rincón

popular culture no longer applies to me

Cup of Mo

An irreverent celebration of coffee mugs and--well--irreverency.

Miss Apostate

"If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is, 'God is crying', and if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is, 'Probably because of something you did'." ~ Jack Handey

Lumos.Nerd

fandom, funny, superwholock, assassin's creed, video games, nerd

Cobweb Queen

you were singing in your sleep

Old Road Apples

A Magnificent Fountain of Gurgling Wit, Wisdom, and Intriguing Insights. Some Other Stuff, Too.

Dearest Someone,

Writing about wellbeing